Monday, June 19, 2017


Sometimes it's hard to explain myself 
I become tongue tied and frustrated 
It is not because I am scared of being rejected.
I've learned to move on from that 
Telling myself that it's nothing,  something I'll look back on and laugh about

I yearn to write but whenever I sit down to do so
Something happens to keep me from doing it.

I stood at the edge staring into the lake 
Cold but freaking amazing 
Watching the waves splash onto the concrete 
The moon shining so brightly 
It made me feel at peace....

I had a lot to say...
But then the words start evaporating.
And then...
I come up blank.
It never mattered before 
I knew I wasn't right.
Not the pretty kind of wrong...
So I clung to my words, hoping to find some type of peace
But I stopped.

Now I only find hate...
Empty promises
Empty words 
Telling myself that I can do it.

The Dissappearing Act.
That's what I call it.

I want to drink myself silly.
I want to scream at the top of my lungs 
But all that comes out is a squeak

Maybe I'll drink myself silly....
And scream into the night
With my little squeaks....

Oh darn it.

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